“I was crying.”
The last sentence of A Lesson Before Dying. Narrated by Grant as he returns to his classroom at the end of the book, it is a very meaningful and demonstrative sentence. It represents Grant’s character growth, both as a regular person in the story and as a heroic figure. Throughout the novel, I have struggled to view Grant as the hero (assuming, of course, that there can only be one hero), looking instead to Jefferson as the main heroic character. This final line reassured me of Grant’s heroism.
The aspects of a heroic journey are present throughout Grant’s story. At the beginning of the book, he repeatedly refuses the call before finally acquiescing. Even as he begins to visit Jefferson on a regular basis, he continues to refuse the call, acting like a stubborn teenager sneaking home after visits. In my opinion, Grant doesn’t fully accept the call until chapter 22, when he offers to bring Jefferson the radio. Before this, Grant seems more aloof to me, not putting effort into creating a connection with Jefferson. But, starting here, with the offer of a radio, Grant begins to strengthen his connection with Jefferson, convincing him to be more open to conversing with Miss Emma, bringing him treats, and offering him a way to express himself through writing. Though Grant does go against Paul’s advice and becomes close to Jefferson during this time, their connection is good for both of their heroic journeys.
Grant’s heroic journey is also not lacking in obstacles. From the physical obstacle of being searched at the jail to the mental obstacle of considering his work to be futile, Grant has to go through a lot in order to believe that he can make a difference in Jefferson’s life, and really in the lives of all of the residents of the community.
In the end, Jefferson becomes evidence of how teaching is not futile, how Grant had simply not been teaching the right things. In a way, I believe Reverend Ambrose was right, Grant did not understand people. He, like Jefferson, didn’t really understand what it was to care for someone. As Grant taught Jefferson that he was cared for, Jefferson taught Grant what it was to truly care for someone, not simply to depend on them. When Grant cries, he is acknowledging what he has learned and what he has taught, and I suspect, imagine, hope, that this influences how he teaches in the future.
Good post. Grant's crying is indeed a fitting conclusion to his journey, from being forced to spend time with Jefferson to being such good friends with him that he ends up crying.
ReplyDeleteCrying and shedding tears out of a sense of unhappiness is something that only humans do (at least to my limited knowledge). The fact that Grant cried when Jefferson died really goes to show that Grant has given in to the emotions he had been trying to hold back for the large majority of the story. Grant crying shows us that Jefferson had gone from being some burden that ties Grant down that he has to get out of the way to a person (not a hog) that Grant has legitimately grown to care about.
ReplyDeleteGrant is initially worried about "getting too close" to Jefferson, and I agree that his tears signify that he HAS gotten close, and that this is a GOOD thing. Your closing comment reflects some optimism for the future and Grant's teaching: in many ways, he's been avoiding getting "too close" to his students, since he views the whole project of education as futile (they're all "sentenced to death" in a way, and he can't "save all of them"). Perhaps what he's learned before Jefferson's dying is that it's not only okay to get emotionally invested in his students and their lives, it's perhaps *essential*.
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